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""I
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Helping you to say "I Do"! |
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Wedding Ceremony Tips: Don't forget the Important Parts! In the excitement of wedding planning, finding a dress, finding locations, and so on, sometimes the details of the ceremony itself can get lost in the shuffle or forgotten until the last minute, when decisions must be made on the spot by the officiant, groom, parents or others. Here are some things to consider beforehand, to ensure your wedding ceremony reflects what you really want and goes off without a hitch. These tips are based on conversations with priests, rabbis, ministers and many brides: Processional Order 1) Decide ahead of time the order in which the wedding party will proceed down the aisle, as well as who will be escorted, and by whom. You don't want your parents to be lost in the shuffle and seated with regular guests, not given front row seats, or left to find their seats on their own. Traditionally, regular guests are seated by ushers, then other special guests (like godparents), then grandmothers, then the groom's mother, then the bride's mother. After that the wedding party walks down the aisle in the order you have determined. 2) The order and escort choices for the processional are many, and depend in part on the religious nature of the wedding ceremony. Determine what you will do beforehand and make sure everyone involved knows about it. For example, while tradition has the father of the bride escorting her down the aisle, it is perfectly acceptable to have both parents escort the bride, or for the bride to walk down the aisle unaccompanied. If the bride and/or groom have children, their children sometimes escort them down the aisle. 3) For civil wedding ceremonies, you can do whatever you like. Most couples choose the format of one of the religious ceremonies, but you can vary it however you like. The only mistake is not making this decision beforehand. 4) Protestant Wedding Ceremonies: The groomsmen and groom generally wait at the altar, having entered from the rear of the church. The bridesmaids walk down the aisle one at a time, with the maid of honor last. Then the ring bearer and flower girl enter (if any). The bride then enters with her father or other close male relative (or both parents, as is becoming more common). If the ceremony is taking place outside a church or for some reason the groomsmen can't enter from the rear, one option is for the groom to escort his mother to her seat and then take his place at the alter. The groomsmen then escort the bridesmaids, one couple at a time, down the aisle. 5) Catholic Wedding Ceremonies: For Catholic ceremonies, you can do your procession the liturgical way or the traditional way; you need to decide what works best for you. Most churches will allow you to do your procession however you wish. According to the Catholic wedding rite, the bride and groom process in together, after the readers, the principle attendants, and the priest. This is because they are both administering the sacrament of marriage to one another, and everyone else witnesses them do this. The symbolism of this method is lovely and reflects the reality of marriage. However, many Catholic weddings follow the traditional procession with the bride being "given away." This is not based on the Catholic liturgy but on tradition. The priest, groom and best main wait at the altar. Groomsmen then enter from the side or accompany the bridesmaids. The bridesmaids then come down the aisle, starting with the maid who will stand farthest from the bride. The ring bearer and flower girl (if any) enter, and may be seated with their parents after they reach the altar. The bride enters, accompanied by her father or other close relative (or both parents). 6) Jewish Wedding Ceremonies: The rabbi (and cantor, if one) lead the procession. Then the groomsmen walk down the aisle one at a time. They are followed by the groom, who is accompanied by both of his parents. The bridesmaids follow, one at a time. Finally the bride enters, accompanied by both of her parents. Recessional Order For the recessional, the wedding party always exits in the reverse order from which they entered, with the bridesmaids and groomsmen walking in pairs. In Christian weddings, the bride and groom lead the way, followed by the flower girl and ring bearer, honor attendants and bridesmaids and groomsmen. In Jewish weddings, the bride and groom are followed by the bride's parents, the groom's parents, the honor attendants, the bridesmaids and groomsmen, and then the rabbi and cantor.
Critical Wedding Ceremony Details 1) Put your payments for the ceremony, as well as the reception and any other payments for that day, in envelopes and entrust those to someone responsible to give out that day. The bride and groom will be busy and involved in the events of their wedding--don't count on remembering these details! 2) Check with your officiant at the rehearsal or before, to ensure you know what must be brought to the ceremony. Entrust those items to someone responsible, perhaps the best man or maid of honor. These items will include the rings, the marriage license, your unity candle, programs and any other important items for the ceremony. Don't forget to make arrangements for necessary items to be REMOVED from the church after the wedding as well. 3) Timing: Make sure your ceremony starts on time, or as close to it as possible. While you may want to wait for latecomers, a delay will throw off everything else and be disrespectful to those people ready on time. Some guests will always arrive late, or even skip the ceremony and arrive for the reception. Do not base your timing on them. If you do so, there will be less time for photos and socializing later. 4) Vows, Poems, Readings: Your selection of these should be made carefully, and you should be confident that everyone with something to say or read will be prepared ahead of time. Even if they have memorized what they will say, ensure THEY BRING A WRITTEN COPY! In the excitement of the moment, it is all too easy to forget lines. Keep the length of the service in mind as you select readings, vows, songs and poems. You could probably fill hours with descriptions of your love for each other, but keep the big picture in mind. Your choosing to marry is the biggest statement of your love for each other. Each item you add to the ceremony, whether a poem, song, unity candle, or whatever, lengthens the ceremony. Particularly if you are having a Catholic ceremony with a mass, be aware of the overall length and considerate of your guests and yourselves. A two-hour wedding ceremony may not be one that you will all remember fondly... 5) Programs: You need to decide if you want a wedding program. Traditionally these list the order of your ceremony and the names of your wedding party. The order of ceremony is less important if you are keeping it short. This is also where many people offer thank yous and special recognition or memorial notes. These can be photocopied onto stock, printed by a professional printer, or printed at home by you. The hottest new format for wedding programs is the wedding program fans, especially for summer and warm climate weddings. Need help with your wedding program content or layout? Check out Antonia Rose Printing's wedding programs tips page. 5) Remember that the ceremony IS your wedding, and the reception is the celebration of your marriage. Don't let the ceremony preparation get lost in the shuffle!
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