Wedding Registry Tips

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Wedding Registry Tips

Where to register for wedding gifts?

Your wedding registry options these days are many, from the traditional local department store to online-only stores. You can even register at multiple stores, though be aware this makes it more difficult for your guests.
In deciding where to register for wedding gifts, first think about who will use the wedding registry. If most of your guests are on the west coast, registering at Marshall Fields probably is not a good idea. Consult with the mothers on this decision if you are inviting a lot of family members.
Considering that news of your registry choices will be spread by word-of-mouth, limit the number of places you register to one or two, so people can remember them. We recommend registering at a major department store and then no more than one specialty store (like Crate & Barrel or Bed, Bath and Beyond, for example.)
Online registries are a huge convenience for guests who use the internet regularly. They can peruse your list and then order a gift all online. Here in MN, popular department store choices are Marshall Fields, JC Penney and Target, and then the other department stores at the Mall of America like Bloomingdale's, Macy's and Nordstrom. If you register at the MOA stores, be sure your MN guests actually shop there. All of the above offer online registries except for Nordstrom. There are also exclusively online registries not associate with a store. This is great if most of your guests are internet-savvy and would use this, but not helpful for others.
Finally, you will probably be doing a lot of business at the store with which you register, so make sure you are comfortable with their prices and service. They should be able to help you set up your registry, advise you on your choices if you like, and touch base with you along the way. Ask about their service before you sign up. After the wedding, you will probably be returning some items (duplicates and so on) and purchasing others with gift money (to complete your china or such). Ask them how they handle this and what they require. You will not have receipts for most or many gifts; will they accept returns of registry items without a receipt?

What to register for?

There are several guidelines to keep in mind as you are choosing your items, whether online or prowling the store with a scanner:

1) Stick with quality. Buy cheap items, if you must, when you are buying for yourself. Whatever their budget, nobody wants to give something cheaply made as a wedding gift, and you want to be using your gifts a long time.

2) Keep your guest list size and your guests' likely budget in mind as you register. If you are having a smaller wedding and/or your family is not wealthy, you probably will not get 12 sets of fine china, 12 each of crystal goblets, wine glasses and champagne glasses, 12 sets of silver or fine stainless and 12 sets of casual china! If you don't want to end up with 2 of this and 1 of that (requiring you to return some items to get a full set of others, or to have a full set of nothing...), register only for the items you REALLY want and will use the most.

3) Remember these gifts are for a lifetime of marriage. You may not see how fine china fits into your life now, but imagine yourself in 5 or 10 years. Will you host holiday meals, or want to make birthdays special?

3) Beware of the scanner...it can help you or hurt you. Many stores give you a scanner and have you walk through scanning in everything you want on your list. While this is easy and fast, it can result in an over-specific list that makes it harder for guests to buy for you. A 20 page list is overwhelming to most people looking for a shower or wedding gift. Do you really need to list every $2 utensil you want? Do you need to specify the brand and style of the barbeque set? You don't want your loved ones to feel micromanaged as they look for gift ideas.

4) The purpose of the registry is to be a guide to help people select a gift, if they choose to use it. Some people will not use it, others will check it and then disregard it. It is not a set of directions to your loved ones as to where they must shop and what they must purchase, but a guide to your needs, wants and taste. Keep this in mind as you are completing it. Guest may purchase your items at another store, such as an outlet store or on sale, or they may purchase similar but not exact items. They may give you something not on your list. This is NOT rude behavior by your guests in any way, and they are not expected to call the store where you registered to notify the store of their purchase. (Some may do so as a courtesy.)

How to tell everyone about your wedding registry?

It is tacky, tacky, tacky to put your registry information on shower or wedding invitations or announcements. That is a blatant request for gifts, which are not mandatory and are supposed to be an expression of love for you.

If people ask where you are registered, by all means tell them. You or your mother, sister or best friend can call those closest to you to inform them and ask them to get the word out. THEY (not you) can email or call people to tell them this information. If people want to know, they can and will ask. If they don't ask, they may well feel confident choosing a gift without this information. It is your job to be gracious about any and all gifts you receive.